Difficult

And just like that. It's over again.
Like it ever really started.
Nothing you do makes sense. Like I should have expected this to make some sort of twisted sense.
I guess that is what had made it fun. Or made me feel lucky. Like I had won.
But luck can turn in an instant.
I'd been here before. I'd seen this so many times.
This time I had to be stronger.

"and you tried to change didn't you?
closed your mouth more
tried to be softer
prettier
less volatile, less awake
but even when sleeping you could feel
him travelling away from you in his dreams
so what did you want to do love
split his head open?
you can't make homes out of human beings.
Someone should have already told you that."

~ For Women Who Are Difficult to Love, Warsan Shire